People want open marriages for different reasons, and for some families, it can work well. But it’s not for everyone.
A reader named Samantha, 33, wrote to us about her experience, which was quite dramatic. Samantha is a loyal wife and didn’t want to share her husband with anyone. However, her husband kept insisting, so she decided to teach him a lesson about respect.
Samantha shared her story in a letter. She wanted us to publish it as it is. She wondered if others would support her decision to teach her husband a harsh but justified lesson.
In her letter, Samantha said, “I’m 33 and thought I had achieved everything a woman could dream of by now. I have a happy family with my beloved husband, Steve, who is 39. We run a successful business, have a lovely home, and most importantly, two adorable kids.”
“Our life was great until one day, Steve decided he wanted a change in our relationship and suggested an open marriage, which I really didn’t like.”
Samantha continued, “Steve, my husband for 12 years, practically forced me to agree to this open marriage. He told me, ‘You have to agree, or I’ll divorce you.’ Because I love him, I agreed, and we both started seeing other people.”
“Recently, we had a huge fight because one of my partners sent me beautiful flowers and an expensive ring with a big diamond. Before this, Steve had bought gifts for his partners, so it seemed fair. We both chose our partners and accepted gifts from them.”
“But for some reason, the flowers and ring I received made Steve really angry.”
Samantha explained that Steve’s reaction to the gifts was part of her plan.
She said, “Steve got very upset when he saw the flowers and the ring. He called me a careless woman and a bad mother. He said it was wrong for a stranger to know my address and send gifts to our home where our kids live. He claimed I wasn’t thinking about our kids’ safety and became very emotional.”
“Then he started crying. He was really upset and blamed me for everything. When I tried to remind him that he was seeing other women and I was okay with it, he didn’t want to listen. I had never seen him cry like that before. This time, he seemed completely broken.”
“And this was part of my plan.”
Samantha taught her husband an important lesson.
She wrote, “While Steve was dating other women, I stayed faithful to him. I only pretended to have other men in my life because I didn’t want to feel humiliated. But I had a plan to show my husband that he’s not irreplaceable and that one day, a man would treat me like a queen.”
“I didn’t give my address to anyone else. I bought the flowers myself and arranged for them to be delivered. The ring was a family heirloom from my grandma, and I knew it was valuable. I set everything up to look like I got an expensive gift from a partner, but I didn’t actually have any partners.”
She shared, “Now, Steve wants us to go back to a monogamous marriage and says he’s tired of ‘these experiments.’ But I don’t want him to feel comfortable. I recently told him that I liked the idea of an open relationship and that I’m reconsidering my views on it.”
“Now, my husband is trying hard to convince me that the open relationship was his mistake. It makes me happy to see him trying to win me back. I think it was worth it. What would you do if you were in my place?