My Boyfriend Criticizes How I Run My Home but Refuses to Move Out

Living with a partner can be great for companionship and support, but it can also be challenging when you have different lifestyles. This is what one woman shared online.

Here’s her story:
I’m 28 and bought my house 5 years ago with money from my great aunt who passed away. I was also saving for a home, so I used the money to buy a house and pay off my student loans. I’m very grateful for that.

I bought a small house on a big lot, which was affordable back then because most people wanted big houses.

My boyfriend, 31, moved in a year ago and pays rent, but it’s much lower than he would pay elsewhere. Recently, he started complaining about how I run my house. He doesn’t like that I hang laundry outside or that I turned the front yard into a wildflower garden and clover lawn. He says it looks “ghetto,” even though he doesn’t spend time outside.

The biggest argument happened because I decided to get chickens. My city has a program that allows backyard chickens with a permit. I applied for 3 years and finally got it, so I built a coop last summer. My boyfriend refused to help, saying it would make the house look like a barnyard. I built it myself, and now he complains that he moved in to live in a house, not a farm. He claims the chickens will be disgusting, but our neighbor has chickens, and there are no weird smells or sounds.

Last night, I got 4 chickens and told him. He yelled at me for not listening to him. I got fed up and told him to move out if he can’t stand living with chickens. He got quiet and ignored me today. I think he doesn’t want to move out because of high rent elsewhere. He always says that because he pays rent, he should have a say.

Was I wrong for telling him to move out because he won’t let me do what I want on my own property? My house is finally looking like my dream home, and I put in a lot of work. I feel like he is intruding on my paradise and being very critical, which makes me want him to leave.

People stood on her side.

  • “You two are incompatible and should break up.”

 

  • “If he’s so concerned about how the place looks, he can go live in a bad apartment instead.”

 

  • “I think in a relationship people do need and communicate and share their vision for their futures. Y’all aren’t compatible. You want this house and to make it a certain way. He doesn’t. It’s time to move on for each of you.

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