I Stopped My Husband from Sending Money to His Mom, Now She Says I Ruined Her Life

Today’s story is about a wife who feels left out in her own marriage and decides to stop her husband from sending money to his mom. This choice, meant to protect their own family, causes a lot of emotions and hurt feelings.

Here’s what happened: I (33F) and my husband Matteo (31M) have been married for 4 months and together for 3 years. When we were dating, his mom would randomly call and ask for money—anywhere from $2,000 to $6,000. Matteo said she had been doing this for years, but he didn’t mind because he had a high-paying job and could afford to help her.

My father-in-law (FIL) is a successful businessman, and I thought they had joint bank accounts, so I always found it strange that she asked her son for money. When we got engaged, we talked about his mom’s money requests, and my husband agreed to stop sending her money. And he did. She stopped calling.

But last Tuesday, my mother-in-law (MIL) called and asked my husband for $15,000, saying she needed it for a vacation. After he said no, she sent me a long text saying I had no right to interfere in a mother’s relationship with her son. I didn’t reply. I asked my husband if his parents were having money problems, and he said everything seemed fine.

Today, my FIL and sister-in-law (SIL) came over for lunch. FIL was helping us pick a bottle of wine when I asked if everything was okay at home. He looked confused and asked what I meant. That’s when my husband told him about his mom asking for money.

It turns out that my MIL has secretly been asking my husband for cash. Last year, she took money from the bank and told my FIL it was to help pay for our wedding, but she lied—she never gave us any money.

My FIL left right away, and hours later, my MIL called me crying, saying I had a big mouth and ruined her life. FIL wrote us a check to pay back the money and has separated from my MIL for now until he feels he can trust her again. Now, my husband’s relatives are calling me the bad guy.

People stood on her side.

  • “You’re not the one who has been lying and leeching for money. Hope your FIL divorces her.

 

  • “You asked out of concern, and you brought what sounds like tens of thousands of dollars in spending to his attention that she had been hiding, for whatever reasons. If she needed the money for a good reason, she wouldn’t have been lying about it.

 

  • “You busted a gold-digging scammer, out of concern and love for your husband and his father. It’s natural to feel guilty for upsetting someone, and for big life changes to happen to others. But sometimes it’s necessary to upset someone and change circumstances.

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