When discussing their mothers-in-law, some individuals opt for kind words and expressions, focusing solely on positive emotions. However, others may refer to their MILs as “monster-in-law,” and there’s often a reason behind it. This rings true for our protagonist today, a 33-year-old woman who once held optimistic expectations about her relationship with her husband’s mother. However, her hopeful outlook shattered after a dinner outing with her MIL.
Anna, 33, reached out to us for advice because she’s scared of her mother-in-law, even though her husband thinks she’s overreacting. She wants to know if others would feel the same way in her situation.
She explained, “My husband, Geff, and I have been married for 3 years. Both of us have been married before. I’m divorced and have a 5-year-old daughter from my previous marriage. Geff is also divorced. While I’ve shared everything about my past marriage with him, he’s been silent about his. Now I understand why. It turns out his mother, Stella, was the reason his ex-wife left him. Let me tell you what happened.”
Anna described how her relationship with Stella started off smoothly. Stella seemed polite and friendly, and Anna hoped for a good relationship with her. But things took a turn for the worse, as Anna soon found out.
Anna continued her story, explaining how Stella, her mother-in-law, always showed immense love for Geff, her son. Whenever they visited Stella, she would proudly display Geff’s childhood photos and recount his old stories repeatedly. Anna didn’t mind hearing them again and again, thinking it showed a strong mother-son bond.
But as Anna’s pregnancy progressed, Stella’s behavior became more irritating. Anna revealed, “I’m 5 months pregnant now. When we shared the news, Stella was thrilled, expressing her love for her future grandson. She even insisted that the baby would be a boy, although we preferred to keep the gender a surprise. She also demanded that we name the baby after Geff, regardless of gender. This made me realize she was overly involved and possessive about our unborn child, but I didn’t confront her about it.”
Anna shared a troubling incident from a dinner outing with her mother-in-law (MIL). While Anna’s husband and father-in-law were away at a concert, Anna and her MIL went out to dinner. Since the MIL and FIL were visiting from out of state and staying with them for a few days, Anna felt the tension building. Anna described her MIL as intense, especially in expressing her love for her son Geff. Anna believed this intensity extended to their unborn baby, hence the MIL’s strong desire for a grandson named Geff.
During dinner, things took a dark turn. Anna recounted, “After three cups of herbal tea, my MIL looked at me and said, ‘If you ever hurt my son, I’ll make sure you regret it for the rest of your life. And Geff’s dad will too. We know how to deal with women who hurt our boy.'” Anna was shocked by this statement, especially after three years together and previous compliments from her MIL about their relationship.
Anna admitted, “I was so shocked that I couldn’t respond the way I wanted. I tried to reassure her, but it felt like a threat.” When Anna told Geff about it later, he wasn’t surprised or upset. Anna suspects there was something wrong with her MIL’s behavior in Geff’s previous relationship, and she worries it might happen again. She’s considering limiting her MIL’s involvement with their baby due to this gut feeling. Do you think Anna is overreacting?”
